Monday, June 8, 2015

Marriage Works ~ I Only Have Eyes for You

One thing that really gets under my skin is when I have a woman come to me for counsel because her husband has "encouraged" her to watch her weight.

From the time that your wife was a little girl she's wanted to know that she's beautiful and that she's loved for who she is.

Whether she wears makeup or not.
Whether she can always fit in her wedding gown or not.
Whether she covers her grey hair or not.
Whether she loses the baby weight or not.
Whether she takes a shower that day or not.
Whether she agrees with you or not.
Whether she cooks dinner or not.
Whether she has a job outside of the home or not.
Whether she had a good day or not.

If you want to deflate your wife's self esteem, let her know how many calories are in that glass of wine/doughnut/box of crackers. Pick up the next Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue and let the post-pregnant woman know she'd look great in that bikini the airbrushed model is wearing. Tell her she needs to join the gym or try the P90X workout.

You may be thinking, "But I love my wife. I only want her to be healthy."

That's wonderful, but if you're not making the effort to be healthy alongside her, then you're implying her exterior beauty could use some work. Which means you're telling her:

If you don't lose the post-pregnancy weight, you're no longer attractive to me.
If you don't color your greying hair, you're no longer attractive to me.
If you don't wear makeup that camouflages those wrinkles beneath your eyes, you're no longer attractive to me.
If you don't...

Hopefully by now, you get the picture.

Thankfully, my husband knows how to let me know I'm beautiful inside and out. He admires my aging body as my metabolism slows and my waistline grows. I don't feel like I need to binge and purge or fast in order to remain attractive to him.

Your wife needs to know that she is lovely inside and out. She needs to know that no matter what her body does as she matures, you find her attractive. She needs to know that you only have eyes for her.

Because, after all, every woman is going to age, and those models you admire will wrinkle and bulge with time. And they won't always have an airbrush to make them admirable.

Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
- Proverbs 31:30


You may be crushing your wife's self-esteem... {Click to Tweet}

Your wife's inner beauty is more important than her good looks. {Click to Tweet}

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